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If you’re one of the 181,000+ people who follow Latinx Parenting on Instagram, you’ll have noticed that each post ends with a handful of hashtags, including #RaisingFutureAncestors, #DecolonizeOurFamilias and #EndChanclaCulture.
The last refers the chanclaThe flip-flop is that Latinx mother are often depicted as using spanking or threat to their children by immigrant and Latinx moms. Leslie Priscilla (mother of three, advocate who founded Latinx Parenting), talks about ending violence against children. chancla Culture, she refers to the abandonment of violence, shame, and fear as parenting strategies.
“Chancla Culture is any form of authoritarianism, power-over dynamics or a Latinx family’s culture,” the former teacher and behavior coach explained to Yahoo Life. He also said that it was tied to “the way we normalize violence against children in our community.”
“Normalization is achieved through sharing memes and videos, where you often see a grandmother or mother holding a sandal. This is what we call the chanclaShe adds, “And so, that emblem speaks to the overall dynamic that many families and Latinx communities have accepted about how children should be treated. … It goes far beyond corporal punishment and into what I refer to as emotional chancla, verbal chancla. Anything that could hurt you or touch your heart or spirit or emotions can be just as harmful as an actual. chancla That’s what you feel.”
Priscilla witnessed this firsthand. California native Priscilla is the daughter to two Mexican immigrants, who grew up in a fear-based environment. She was spanked and made to suffer verbal and emotional violence that left her feeling disconnected from her family as well as herself. Priscilla attributes her teenage depression and anxiety to this disconnection. But, her birth of her younger half-sister provided an opportunity to rethink how parenting could look in her family. Priscilla now says, “I wanted her at least to have one person in my life that was going be really solid.”
Even so, her realization that the toxic tendencies she had as a child was a cultural thing that extends backwards and outwards to our past came after she studied child psychology in college and became a parent.
According to the parenting coach, colonization was responsible for the rise of fear-based discipline as well as corporal punishment. chancla culture.
She says that most Indigenous kinship groups did not use corporal punishment before colonization. “And so, over the past 500 years, we have learned to pass the oppressors’ tools onto our children. The systemic oppression and marginalization of our families makes it very difficult for us practice gentle parenting and research-based parenting. “We live in constant stress, which can be traced back to 500 years ago.”
As head of Latinx Parenting, Priscilla — who identifies as both Mexican-American and a “detribalized” Indigenous person — leads workshops for caregivers and professionals alike, with themes ranging from practicing decolonized, non-violent parenting; intergenerational healing; children’s mental health and more. You may also see her posting on Instagram about how important it is to nurture her “inner”. niñe” This is a way of reparenting Kate Middleton’s parenting, or to defend it from mom-shamers.
“It is impossible to imagine that I have so many eyes on my and having the expectation of being a perfect parent with a perfect kid,” she said of the duchess who was criticised for her behavior during royal events when her youngest child, Prince Louis, was agitated. It is truly sad that people cannot empathize with me.
Priscilla, as someone who has spoken out against the use of shame as a method of discipline, tries to have compassion for other parents, especially those of color who are frequently scrutinized while they are with their children in public.
She said that she believes women of color are the most affected. “There’s an angry Black woman trope, and a spicy Latina; there are stereotypes and expectations that we have to fight every day… that are reinforced sometimes by our own people to be truthful with you. We can’t be loyal to the expectations we are held to.
This can increase the stress parents feel which may lead to a child becoming more stressed. Priscilla believes that prioritizing her mental health makes it easier for her to show her children how self-regulation should look. She’s able to instill more long-term behavior to resolve conflicts than snapping at her children and relying on quick fixes like spanking or shouting, which can lead to disconnection and “a fear pattern.” However, she is clear that it is still a work-in-progress.
“The most important thing to tell parents is that you’re going gonna make mistakes. She points out that there will be many mistakes. “The expectation is not perfection.”
Priscilla, Latinx Parenting’s next generation of parents, acknowledges that it can be difficult for some parents to call out their grandparents or parents.
“Because our history, have we developed this very strong value respect and the value familismoShe says that this is the essence of how collectivism is expressed in families. Respect is often misinterpreted as fear. People also misinterpret the ways that our grandparents parent and our reflections of them as disrespectful. There is a strong need to respect our elders. Respect for elders is an Indigenous practice. However, we hold it very dear.
However, it is not disrespectful or disloyal to older generations to wish to heal old wounds.
“It is also respectful to reflect and have sovereignty, and to be an individual,” she said. These nuances must be explored by the community. It’s almost like if I don’t reflect on my childhood, I might repeat some of the same words or do the same harm.
“It’s never about blame and it will never about shame, and I think people have a difficult time with that,” she says. They’re like, “But if I say my parents hurt me isn’t it blaming? It’s not like that. You’re just being an advocate for your inner child at that moment. They are not to blame. You’re understanding them in the context of their culture, their family history, their cultural history — but you can still own what Your Experience is. It’s really been empowering to me to be able say, “Your experience may differ from mine, but we can still combine our experiences.”
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