Two parents have been dragged to the internet by their dispute over who would pay for their child’s unanticipated medical bills.
In a now-viral post on Reddit, a father under the username u/Admirable-Shallot155 told the story, which can be read in full here.
“I am divorced from my sons mom, and she chose the easy route out of the financial arrangements. The poster said that she was responsible for paying for certain items, like the private school tuition and extracurricular activities of our sons. “She doesn’t pay much for coverage, and our sons don’t require medical care. Until now.”
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Their eight-year-old son was recently diagnosed with a dental issue and required oral surgery.
“We finally found a great pediatric oral surgeon, and it will cost us $3,000. This is because the dental insurance doesn’t cover much and an anesthesiologist costs a lot.
“My ex asked if I was going.” [to pay] half. “I said NOPE,” shared my father.
Emma Kenny, a psychologist, told Newsweek“Money is probably one of the most contentious issues in co-parenting. It is real and can be used as a measure of how much you care about your child.
He was clear with his daughter that he wasn’t going to compromise. He explained that he said, “This is your problem, not mine.” Remember, this is what you wanted.
The poster said that “She didn’t have that much cash lying around” and that it was not sensible to put it on a credit-card with interest rates. “I told her she should go sell blood. I don’t care. I budget my money so that it doesn’t seem like a big deal.
His ex-wife got a loan to cover the cost of the procedure and the tooth was extracted. However, the dispute over the payment caused much tension.
Both Parents Slammed
The post on Reddit’s popular r/AmITheA****** forum has received over 8,000 upvotes and more than 3,000 comments as Redditors slammed both parents for their behavior.
One replied, “Everyone sucks there.” “Your wife for trying renege on the agreement, and you for being more interested in sticking to it to her than your boy’s welfare.”
Another Redditor said: “I used to be this kid once. And he knows about the squabbling. His dad said what they did. It’s making him feel bad. You can’t upset a child that has to go through such a terrifying procedure.
Kenny, who has many years of experience with divorce and separation, explained that it is best to keep children out of arguments. Money, however, can always be an aggravating factor. If you allow your ex to struggle, it is letting your children suffer.”
Kenny said, “If you have made arrangements to split the money 50/50,” he added. However, unexpected costs can happen and parents should be open to negotiating. It’s more than just about legal rules. It’s about morality and ethics. Your ex-partner might have more than you do, so as a parent, you should prioritize your child’s needs and not worry about how you can make ends meet.
Reddit users continue to voice their opinions and criticize both parents fairly equally. One person said that if you have a child together, you should love your child as much as you hate your ex. It is clear that you are doing the opposite.
Another commenter said, “You care more about hurting your ex than your child’s existence.”
Kenny said, “It’s about what is most important: safeguarding your child’s health or fighting with your ex over who pays what and how to split the bills.” It’s not because you love your ex, it is because you care about your child. Parents should seek mediation if they are unable to resolve the issues themselves.
Newsweek reached out to u/Admirable-Shallot155 for comment. We were unable to verify the details.
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