How many photos of a child should be taken during his/her lifetime? The majority of people, unfortunately for them would say that there is no limit. In this day and age — for better or for worse — everything they do is documented. Are they wearing their cute pink and blue hospital cap? Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap.
We just can’t help ourselves! They’re just so stinkin’ cute. Even though many celebrities and parents of famous children keep their pictures private, the urge to spread them is insatiable. Because again, they’re so stinkin’ cute! The parents can post the photos they want, but it gets dicey when loved ones and family members also want to upload theirs. Is it okay to take a picture with them asleep? This caption looks ok. It’s up to the parents. Whatever they decide, it should be posted.
The operative word there is “should.” But this article is about a post from the Reddit “Am I The A—hole” (AITA) subreddit, and if you’ve been following along, people hardly ever do what they “should.”
A mother-in law’s Mess
Reddit was used by a mom to inform others that, about a month ago, her MIL shared pictures and videos of her son bathing naked. She only recently discovered that the photos and video are still available on her Facebook page.
“I feel so riddled with guilt for not knowing about them and doing something so much sooner,” the original poster (OP) wrote.
She hadn’t realized because she — like many people — have family members muted on Facebook because they have different political opinions. We all know how exhausting and disheartening it can be to see that, so sometimes it’s just better to hit mute and save the relationship.
Anyway, this MIL’s son and DIL had told her they didn’t want any naked photos or photos in diapers to be posted on social media.
“I did not think I had to babysit a 53-year-old woman’s Facebook to make sure she was intelligent enough not to post naked photos and a video of my [then-1-year-old] naked in the bath,” OP wrote. “My husband sent her the photo and video but presumably thought that it went without saying NOT TO POST THEM.”
OP recently learned that the photos were still on her MIL’s Facebook page and immediately asked that she take them down and told her she was no longer allowed to post any photos of her children.
“In response to my message — which read about on par with a stern corporate email [because] we’ve had a problem before with her thinking I am aggressive and mean and I didn’t want to add fuel to the fire despite being PISSED — she did take the images and video down.”
This MIL then turned to her son and complained about how “rude” and “disrespectful” his wife was being. He is now upset with OP because she “should have asked [his mom] Remove the pictures and videos [and not demanded].”
Dude. What are you talking about?
He’s now asking his wife to apologize regardless of if she means it.
“I’m now having some doubts as well as a huge feeling of betrayal from my husband,” OP wrote. “She posted nude photos and videos of our child on the internet for all her 300+ ‘friends’ to see. Those photos and video are now who knows where being used in potentially horrific ways and yet I’m the a—hole in this? Because I didn’t politely ask for her to fix something that never should have happened in the first place?”
“Am I really the a—hole here?” she asked.
Redditors knew the answer immediately. OP is most definitely not the a—hole (NTA).
“I literally skipped reading the entire thread to scroll down to comment ‘NTA’ & I’m very happy to see I wasn’t the only one that instinctively thought the same damned thing!” one person wrote. “YOUR nekked babies, YOUR nekked rules.”
“Contact Facebook immediately,” another recommended. “Let them know that naked pictures and videos of small children are posted without their parents’ consent, and FB will very likely take them down pretty damned fast,” one person suggested and others chimed in saying OP should “put her [MIL’s] butt in Facebook jail.”
“I don’t blame you at all,” one Redditor wrote. “It’s explicit photos of a minor. But it’s a weird thing that naked baby pictures are kinda normalized to some people. It’s fucked up. Would she post the pictures naked at 8? What’s the cut-off for naked kid pictures being ok??? It should never be allowed. Even a fresh-out-of-the-womb naked baby picture would be weird to post.”
More Than One AH
Redditors say the MIL isn’t the only problematic person here, and we have to agree. WTF is going on with this man? People say he needs to learn to stand up to his mother and that his insistence that his wife apologize “raises some alarming questions about his judgment (or complete lack thereof).”
“Your husband’s attitude is frankly appalling,” one person wrote. “Does your MIL often run to your husband and complain about you? Your wife and husband seem to be codependent and entangled. Your husband will then continue to support her and her toxic, controlling behavior. I’d have a serious conversation with your spouse about how he must stand up FOR you and WITH YOU when enforcing boundary with his mom. Together, you and him make up the unit. You and him are the unit. You are a team. You should have each others back.”
“NTA. Sorry you’re married to one though,” another said.
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